Fear

Fear is quite the interesting entity. 
Fear creeps and chills and tingles. 
And, yet,
It sweats and tickles and turns. 

As I sit writing this, I turn around in fear of demons after viewing Paranormal Activity II. Regardless, this concept of fear is much different from what I usually experience. 

My more regular idea of fear is not that of ghost and goblins; rather, it is, as I would assume it is for most, an abstract entity. I experience the emotion of fear as an extreme, irrational version of anxiety. 


"Fear foods" are a common word to describe foods Ed has banned. This constitutes fear in that it, too, is irrational and extreme anxiety. Although it seems silly to outsiders, "fear foods" are a huge part of eating disorder recovery, in that they allow the disordered to understand how indeed illogical their fear truly is, and that nothing bad would happen if they continued to experience and consume that food. 


Perhaps hitting at more of the core issues surrounding psychological disorders are fears of people or actions, such as social anxiety or trauma. In order to recover from these fears, intense therapy must be gone through. 



Of what are you afraid? 
What do you fear?

Like, Lust, Love

Fall is quite the romantic season. 

I'm learning romance, lust and love through my new relationships; and not just with my boyfriend, but with reconnecting with friends. 

Eating disorders push people away. While forming a relationship with "Ed", I lost not only my relationships with my friends and family but also my relationship with myself. I've lost who I am and the person I wish to become.  

But life after "Ed" can be as confusing as life with him. What do I like, love, and for what or whom do I lust? What is this sense of romance I so seek? 

I am discovering this, slowly.

Like: Sunshine, black coffee, Asian cuisine, blogging, flowers, books, autumn

Love: Poetry; indie and classical music; uniqueness; recovery; friendship; family

Lust for: Romance, true beauty, chivalry, respect, honesty

What do you like, love, and for what or whom do you lust?




P.S. Thanks to "Psych" for the topic idea!